THIS IS THE ONE!
This past weekend, I had a feeling–one that was dark and gooey–and it wouldn’t go away. I let it fester, like a boil for a few days. Waited to see what this churning in my gut would bring. And man was I surprised when I picked up an brand-new notebook and began writing.
Like really gritty, deep down, black as night, hellish, thing nightmares are made of.
I am so happy.
I’ve been writing a romantic NA for a few weeks and the whole thing just felt really forced. For now, I’ve put it away. I hope to get back to the story I call, A FIFTH OF A SECOND.
But, I have to write this one. I mean, THIS IS THE ONE! It’s screaming out in my head and overwhelming me with the urge to write. For now, I’m calling it BLOOD LETTERS, but that will change at some point. I don’t think it’s a perfect fit, but for now it’ll do.
The main character, Devyn is undeniably the most damaged creature I could ever imagine writing about. I will be hitting on some very hard material, but I have to go with it. It’s who I am and what I write. Here are the first words I wrote as I stood at my stove, cooking dinner for the family:
Ripped open, the chasm in my soul pulls the pain from a place of infinity—a place no one can reach. I left with the nothingness, the inevitable blackened heart.
The survivor in my fights, even though the whisper is only a flutter in my mind. None of this life is mine. I don’t own it, I was made—handcrafted by the demon shaped woman of my dreams.
I didn’t let her in. She wasn’t asked to stay. There was no RSVP to this crazy train party of one. The barriers between naivety and horror blurred with one touch. A stroke of a thorny tail that burned, leaving a boil on the surface ignored.
Turned heads refuse to see the real me; who I am in the after. Who I’ve morphed into and the ugliness I’ve become.